remember: i've not had much sleep...

in light of recent events and my current state of mind, i've decided to give myself some reminders. if you're like me (that is, slightly prone to feeling lonely), consider these to be warnings. i can't believe that a few things could leave me feeling so lacking in companionship.

1. don't hang out with couples married for over 60 years or under 60 days; avoid the recently engaged, happily dating, or single obsessed with dating, marriage, and/or making-out.
2. don't visit the home of any single male who:
- owns his own home
- has a stable career
- makes his own furniture
- is a great host
even if there's no attraction beyond friendship, the encounter will make your mind wander to the subject you want to avoid.
3. don't be friendly to arrogant boys - they will mistake your kindness for flirtation [as though no woman could possibly resist them], and will respond by avoiding you in the hallways at school. while their behavior is a good reminder of how crappy (i decided to delete the expletive)boys can be - and consequently a source of comfort: who wants them?, it can also result in hurt feelings, which lead to added bitterness.
4. don't listen to louis armstrong, otis redding, polyphonic spree, yo la tengo, bjork, beatles, even elliot smith...avoid anything overly melodic or poetical.

INSTEAD:
1. answer every call from single girlfriends who won't laugh at your present condition, but who instead offer to be supportive company.
2. decide to be indifferent to any boy who doesn't know you well enough to accept genuine kindness.
3. sing aloud to shakira, sheila nichols, and ben folds five (mostly whatever & ever...). christmas carols are generally acceptable, though overly sentimental ones that make you have visions of your own children decorating the tree should, of course, be fast-forwarded.
4. most importantly - bundle yourself up well in this cold weather. being able to keep warm on your own reminds you that you don't need anyone's added body heat (with exception to those referred to in #1).