questions for yoder with some thoughts about my future

i've been reading yoder - the politics of Jesus. i usually avoid talking about theological issues on my blog because i get so much of it at school, in my reading, in my writing. since i've started seminary, there is a rarely an issue that doesn't get analyzed in my head in a theological kind of way. it's not the purpose of my blog to find one more avenue for that. i think i would go mad if it were. having said that...i've been reading yoder.

today after our class discussion, i wasn't completely satisfied with how are discussion had ended. i asked my professor if i could ask a question. we sat down to talk, and my questions/frustrations/confusion led to a thirty minute discussion. i value yoder and his contribution to helping me understand the value of the church for action (subordinate action?) to contrast the injustices of our society. i have no issue with understanding the necessity of allowing myself to peacefully accept the role society has placed on me - within the community of the church, in mutual subjection. it's not easy to do, of course, but i have no problem with acknowledging that in light of Christ's life - in his emptying of himself and subjecting himself to the powers of the world to the point of death - it is the only way i can live. i have no problem saying it for myself. but what do i tell my hispanic friend who allows herself to be beaten by her boyfriend because her traditional, mexican upbringing has tended to place that type of subjective role within genders? what do i tell my friends who are children living with parents who ignore their valid emotions and concerns? yoder's words are great for the church community - where we can speak to both parties and demand mutual subordination. what do we do with christians who experience a role of subjugation enforced upon them by one who is outside the church? how in the world can i express my belief that we, as followers of Christ, should allow ourselves to peacefully accept that role? yet, if i say it for myself, i must believe it to be true for others. my position is not one that allows me to live a christian life in a different way from others. we are all mutually valuable. we are one in that aspect, even though we are called to live out different roles within society.

after speaking with me for some time on the issue, i came away knowing there was not an easy answer. i came away convinced that the only way i could find some clarity to my questions was in living within my church community - among those who are different from me, among the poor, among the undocumented, single woman who has no means of representing herself. the only way i can know how they should live out their lives as followers of Christ is by struggling with them and being with them as they ask the same question. it is not for me to have an answer. it is for us - as we live in church community - to begin figuring out.

the conversation ended with my professor saying things too kind and too embarrassing to repeat here. he wanted to know what i wanted to do after seminary and suggested some very challenging things i should look into. one leading to eventually becoming a senior pastor somewhere. he seemed so convinced that i would be able to do all of the many things he spoke of, and in my mind i wondered why he should be so impressed with me. i tell this part of my conversation with him only to say that i am so confused as to what i should do after i graduate. i have considered several non-profit organizations and schools, but i feel now, with some hesitation (it's hard to explain why), that my work must be done within a church community.